1. Add a pillow in there. No, don’t have sex with the pillow, that’s weird. But a pillow can modify most positions by slightly altering the angle of penetration, and that can make a huge difference.
2. Have sex on a deadline. Give yourself 20 minutes, or if you’re daring, an hour where you can’t have sex. Force yourselves to have foreplay until the timer goes off.
3. Wear your socks. Research shows that keeping your socks on during sex can help regulate your body temperature, which in turn makes you more comfortable and it makes it easier to orgasm. Keep a pair of socks around just for sex. Sex socks. Sox.
4. Use a tie. Modify a position by tying your hands behind your back, above your head, or to the bed. Or use it as a blindfold. Limiting mobility or covering your eyes and giving control to your partner can make an old position feel totally new. It’s like the espresso shot of sex modifiers.
5. Toss in your vibrator. You’re making a sex salad, and the vibrator is the cucumbers. Using your vibrator externally while he’s inside you can make even missionary awesome. You can even use it on your partner. Don’t start popping it into holes without asking, but even holding it against his balls can produce some surprising results (spoiler alert: it will make him come).
6. Kiss while you come. This is how people make love and junk. Kissing during an orgasm adds an emotional intensity, like you can almost feel your partner’s orgasm vibrating through you, like when you went on a field trip to the science center and all held hands while someone touched that electricity orb. Someone sappier than me would probably describe it as two bodies becoming one though.
7. Tell him to edge. Edging sounds like something only cool kids do (“Bro, do you even edge?”) but it’s really just a way to describe the act of stopping sex right before the point of orgasm to cool off a bit before starting up again. Forcing each other to hold off from orgasm can make the eventual release much more intense (and also make him last longer).
8. Do it outside the bedroom. The shower, the couch, the kitchen table, the floor. A change of scenery makes for a surprising rush (like when you get to work from home for a day – it’s like, “Where am I?!”). Plus, having sex over the side of an armrest might feel a lot better than doing it over the side of your much shorter bed. You’ve now found a new favorite sex accessory (sexessory? Sorry).
9. Throw in some (approved) anal play. Motherfuckers act like they forgot about the butt. A little anal stimulation can go a long way. That’s what my grandfather always said, anyway. Stimulating the uh, entrance can even be enough to intensify sex (and this goes for both genders). You don’t need to be shoving your fists up there, just move your finger around like you’re trying to recreate that ringing noise that happens when you run your finger around a wineglass. Just make sure you ask first. People are sensitive about their butts.
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