Letter to the Ladies Vol. 11. This article was written by Flamboyant Psychologist Adejoro Olumofin.
(Learn Assertive Training and Diplomatic means with your Mother-in-law)
What is Assertive Training?
This is a Psychological process in which you learn how to
express your views without being rude or suggestive to second or third
party. This being said, the Mother-in-law/Daughter-in-law "beef" or
dispute is a Universal Phenomenon which has caused a lot of problems and
ended a lot of happy marriages and relationships. Some of these
disputes have led to verbal abuse, shouting matches, fights over
territory in the kitchen, disagreement over naming of children and even
Physical confrontations between Mothers and Daughters-in-law.
For you to
understand any situation you have to go to its origin, ladies take
note, before you came into the equation, the apple of your bae's eye and
his number one protector was his mother who he showered with love and
affection and then you came into the picture and suddenly all the
attention shifted from his mother to you. This change is a process,
naturally there will be some tension because it takes some time for
mothers in-law to get used to the fact that their sons are no longer
100% theirs and they have to share him, or permission has to be sort on
certain things in his life which they usually did directly or without
question.
Ladies, you need to learn to be diplomatic with your mothers
in-law because you have more to lose than them. Pick your battles, most
times, your boyfriend or husband will take his mom's side if any dispute
arises. Let me also say that no amount of Diplomacy or Assertive
Training will help you if your man is a "Mommy's Boy" and can't handle
his mom or if his mom doesn't like you. Therefore, if you're in this
situation where your man can not defend you or hold your hand, you need
to develop a thick skin, have patience and most importantly PRAY.
Studies have shown that the mother-in-law/daughter-in-law relationship
is one of the most difficult in social psychology and there isn't any
clear cut solution or approach towards this, because the variables
always differ i.e different mothers/daughters-in-law have different
cultural backgrounds, personalities and family structures. Dear Ladies,
may you not fall into a bad mother-in-law situation. However, learn to
adapt to your environment and also learn how to manage such delicate
relationship in a diplomatic way. Dear mothers in-law, with due respect,
I appeal to you to use your wealth of experience to deal with your
daughters in-law in tactful ways, for the benefit of your son towards
maintaining a happy married life..
Read More Articles on Adejoro Olumofins Instagram : @joroolumofin
Email : olumofinj@yahoo.com
Adejoro is also giving out 1500 of his star studded "Doktor" Mofin SnapBacks to his fans and well wishers from February 14 2015..
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